I Have a Dream…

October 29, 2010

…And I put that dream into an envelope and sent it off with hope and a prayer.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve done this.

My dream, as you all know by now, is to be a published author. Not just any published author, but one whom a large number of people have read. I want to have my books in your living room, taking pride of place in your bookshelf. More than that – I want my words, my thoughts, my story to reach out and touch someone. I want to be a shadow in someone’s mind that stays with them for a long, long time. I want to make a difference in someone’s life. I want to be an author that at least a few readers wish they could talk to or meet.

I don’t know if my other two works have that kind of potential, but I think my adoption story certainly does.

But, for any part of my dream to become even remotely possible, I first have to get my work published. Any of it, or, preferrably, all of it.

So far, I’ve got three completed manuscripts that I’ve been submitting to publishers all over the country. This last one has been out to only one publisher so far, but I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve put the other two in an envelope and sent them out with a hope and a prayer. Most often, my dream goes nowhere. True, I got a nod from one publisher for one manuscript, but it’s still going to take a very long time to get the work from concept to print-and-paper reality. And for the other two works? Nothing.

It’s not as if you have a long list of publishers to try with either – in India, there are very, very few significant publishing houses. And an extraordinary large number of aspiring authors.

One of the most difficult things I’ve ever done is to keep believing in myself and keep going. It is terribly wearying when your dream goes out in an envelope and nothing comes back – month after month after month, nothing comes back. Sometimes you get a brief, polite rejection; sometimes just silence. It empties you out and tears you down to know that the best you have ever done, the best you have in you to do, means so little when it goes out there – just another envelope on a busy editor’s desk.

But there’s nothing to do but to keep trying, and keep hoping, that, against the odds, someone, somewhere, will read your work, and pause, and sit up, and read it again, and smile… and then set about turning your dream into reality.


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