I’ve said it before but I’ve just got to say it again: There’s nothing more depressing, deflating, and demoralizing than going clothes shopping. There’s all these lovely shirts, blouses and tops all over the place, but nothing seems to fit!
I know I’ve put on a bit of weight, but it’s not like I’m really obese right now. It’s just the T-shirts I’m looking at, they don’t even need to be figure-hugging or anything. Any standard size should do – you should be able to tell by just holding it up and looking at it. But no… even when something looks ok, it turns out to be so ingeniously designed and cut that only a 16-year-old would look good in it. And a slim, sexy 16-year-old at that.
I’m convinced they’ve shrunk the sizes. Medium used to be a safe bet, but now even XL doesn’t always work. When I finally found something that fit, and it was a Medium size… in the Plus category! Plus!? I used to be called petite – when and how did I get from over there to over here?!
As if that weren’t bad enough, there’s the changing-room ordeal. Why do all change room mirrors make one look so much more wobbly and blubbery than the more familiar mirrors at home? You’d think the shops would fix the mirrors to work the other way – unless they want to frighten their customers away.
And this entire traumatic experience is just for the shirts. When it comes to jeans and trousers, it gets even worse. Everything that looks so stylish and glamorous on the racks looks so disastrous when you put them on – and that’s only the ones that you can actually squeeze in to. Most of them won’t even come all the way up, forget about the two-inch gap at the button hole.
In the end I came home with three really loose and baggy T-shirts in bright colours, and a good serving of profound depression. Is everybody else on the planet really that slim and trim these days? Really, it doesn’t look like it, if you just look around you. So where are the clothes for all the ‘normal’ women to be found? Or are we all doomed to wear salwar-kameez and saris for ever?